SASHET

I'm still wondering what's churning inside of me.  I don't want to be with anyone.  I want to isolate in my home, not answer the phone and curl up under the covers.

I don't feel depressed though I wonder with the cloudy gray skies if SAD has something to do with it.  I'm trying not to over think it.  Let's see if I can identify the feelings.

The method I'll be using was created by my therapist, Faith Gallup, LCSW.  She calls it SACHET.

Sad?  Yes, for sure.  I had a best friend for the better part of 10 years.  She's been in my dreams and in my thoughts. This is the same person I'm referencing below.  It's also the beginning of the holiday season.  With the feelings of my Dad being stirred up, it adds to the loss of him, Cathy, and Aaron.  Third, my friend Laurie who disappeared last year has disappeared again.  I have to do something about that.

Angry?  Yeah, a little bit here, too.  Even though my car is paid off I still have some obligations.  I want to be able to get the things I need and maybe one or two things I want.  Nothing extravagant, just simple fun.  Then I received a request to give money toward a missions trip from someone I've had no relationship with for at least 3-5 years.  I'm good enough to ask for money but not good enough to have a friendship?

Scared?  Yeah, a little bit.  Sometimes the cold weather scares me because I'm afraid of falling and hurting my back.  But that hasn't happened so it's not a credible fear.

Happy?  Not really.

Excited?  About Feed My Starving Children, yes.

Tender?  Yes, toward Pam as she's struggling with her Prescription D phone calls.  I was able to give her comfort and support.  I gave her a plan which we will do together next week.

It looks as if I have more feelings than I originally thought.  That was a good exercise.  I'm too tired to do the next step of developing a problem solving plan.

Maybe in a day or two.