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| PatC, BonnieB, SueE, CarolD-S |
I was missing Carol, missing my bumming around buddy, dreaming a lot about past friendships and feeling grief/sadness about my lack of self-esteem. I pray for God to help me grow in confidence about myself, especially as I write my story, so I can see many good qualities I have anchored in His love.
I had a nasty migraine during the night. I had a dream about someone I used to serve alongside at church. We grew closer together when her dad was diagnosed with cancer. She let me minister to she and her dad during that sad time. I was surprised because I didn't know she trusted me like that.
At her dad's wake, when she saw me walk in, she walked right at me and surprised me with a huge hug. The friend who drove us there commented she didn't know this person knew me so well. I don't remember answering her. I just remember his daughter looking at me from time to time with a smile.
I never asked anything of her. I always asked God what to do for her. She had a very visible staff position and the last thing I wanted to do was be someone she had to "manage." I sent encouraging notes, scripture verses, even a cassette tape with a song I thought would comfort her.
When I returned from a trip to Japan, we sat and she asked me to recount the entire thing. When I got to the part about the climb up Mt. Fuji, we were both in tears at how God's spirit moved in those moments of the sunrise. She was someone who's heart was tender and appreciated the encouragement I sent her way with no strings attached.
Then one day, it stopped.
Did I do something wrong? No.
Was I out of God's will? No.
Sometimes, relationships stop and we don't know why.
All of our lives continue to go on even when who is in our life changes.
The only constant relationship we are guaranteed is our relationship with God through Jesus Christ. When you have Him, you have everything!
