That's only a small number of corrections I had one evening for two reports. How did I feel? Much differently than I used to. I used to feel my face flush, my insides twist into knots, my voice shake as I continued to speak and I avoided eye contact with everyone in the room. In a word, I lost my confidence. In truth, I gave away my confidence.
This time was different. Each time I read a statement, if it was corrected, I made eye contact with the person. I nodded my head, said thank you then corrected my notes. I did not give into fear nor did I put myself below the person who was correcting the information. What changed?
I knew my disability played a part in my ability to listen and take notes. I also knew most of the people in the room knew this about me. Whether or not they believed me then or believed me now or ever believe me is not my problem. The people who mattered knew of my disability. To them, I did a great job. To me, I did a great job.
Too many times and for too many years I let others be the measuring stick of my self-esteem.
What do they know?
Nothing.
God is the only opinion that matters.
But I have to have a personal relationship with Him.
That's the only way He can make a difference in my life.
I have to seek Him.
"And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." Hebrews 11:6
Do you have a personal relationship with God? Start talking to Him and let Him know you'd like to get to know Him better. Click on my Bible to the right on this screen and order one for yourself. Ask God where He'd like you to begin learning about Him.
There's no wrong place to start. Just get started.
