I began my day the usual way. Scooted kitties off my blanket so I could get out of bed. Ate a little breakfast. Worked on a letter I need for tomorrow. Got myself dressed and headed to therapy. A great and wonderful session that filled me up and addressed a question about self-injury.
My friend Pam and I were going to a large resale shop. I was looking for a coffee table or ottoman but instead purchased a rug for the kitties for winter. Afterwards we headed to Half Price Books in a neighboring city. And that's where I met Amaro.
Pam and I went into the store and began looking around. I was so blessed to find three dvds that I really wanted and a cd for one of my besties. While I was browsing, I heard and saw a man outside yelling and swearing at someone but no one was there. I thought to myself, "Uh-oh. Someone is off their meds."
I didn't think much of it until one of the employees went outside to talk to him. You see, he was standing outside of the store where customers were entering and exiting. He had a cell phone with earphones. He was wearing them when he was yelling and shouting profanity. I could see the employee and it didn't look like it was going very well. So I went outside and stood next to her as she tried to reason with him. He jumped on the 1st amendment and his rights to freedom of speech. She told him he couldn't express himself because it was bothering the customers.
As the conversation between them continued, I walked over and sat on the bricks next to him. I did this to help him calm down and disarm the verbal fight that was about to ensue. Then he began talking about the "end of days" from the book of Revelation and that's when I knew I had an "in" to talk to him. I asked if he was a Christian and he said yes. I told him I was one, too. I talked to him about the verse in the Bible that says our tongue is hard to control. One minute we are singing praises to God and the next minute we are swearing. I told him that even though we have free speech, I was offended by his swearing and then I asked him if he could stop doing it. He began to quiet down and relax. He said yes and then he opened up.
Amaro has had a very hard life. I asked if he was using and he said no. Then I asked when was the last time he used? He's been clean and sober for six months. His girlfriend of ten years moved to Florida with their two kids, ages 4 and 7, while he was using. He owned all the damage he did and has done. He felt regret. He has no job, no friends or family to help him and he was about as discouraged as I've ever seen someone. I asked if he made calls to the county and he said he's called everywhere but cannot seem to get any help. I told him to keep trying.
I asked him if he's ever gotten help from a psychiatrist. He did a long time ago. I shared a little of my story and encouraged him to try and get back on his meds. He talked a lot about his singing and rapping and writing songs. He pulled out some folded papers from his back pocket and showed them to us. I asked if he would sing one. He said he had to be in the zone. I told him that as a drummer, I totally get the zone.
We continued to talk for about a 1/2 hour. He was completely settled down now. I suggested he go inside the store (if he could be quiet) and cool off in the air conditioning. The employee, who I later found out was the manager of the store, offered to give him a pen and paper if he wanted to do some song writing. He was receptive to the idea.
At the end of our conversation, I told him there was nothing I could do and I wished there was. I told him I didn't live around there - I lived in Lake County. He lit up and began laughing about how he wished he lived in Lake County because we have everything. I laughed along and then I told him the only thing I could do was buy him a meal. He hadn't eaten for a few days. I told him to pick a place and I'd go get it and bring it back to him. It was then that we exchanged names. He told me what to go get and I doubled his order so that he would have something to eat and drink later on or tomorrow.
I went back into the store to find Pam and pay for my stuff. The manager walked up to me and thanked me profusely. She was new and hadn't learned how to handle situations like that one. She said she learned so much from me. Pam told her I help people all the time. I felt tender. Amaro was already making himself comfortable in the store as we headed to my car. When I drove back to Half Price Books he was waiting outside. I pulled up, got out of my car and handed him the bag of food and drinks. He thanked me and then I asked if I could pray over him. He said yes.
And right there, in front of the store, I placed my left hand on his shoulder and prayed. I prayed over my hurting brother, that God would give him the courage to keep putting one foot in front of the other, that the doors he needed to walk through would be wide open and shine brightly for him to see and I prayed for provision. Amaro reached out for a hug and I gladly gave one and received his. We said our good-byes, I got back into my car and drove away.
God did not want me fix him. He wanted me to listen to him and all the stressors in his life. He did not want me to give him money but to instead give him two meals. He wanted me to use my mental heath knowledge, my instrument experience and my Bible memory verses to help this young man have some hope for a brighter future.
Sometimes, you have to look beyond the behavior to see the deep hurt in someone's soul.
Isn't that what Jesus would do?
I believe so.
