Seek me O, God, for I cannot find,
The healing you bid me from
The horrors in my mind.
Reflections and pictures and snapshots I see,
Of my small framed body
Staring back at me.
Is she four no six no eight,
But does it really matter?
I can't think straight.
Deliverance? Trust? Are you kidding me?
I was all alone
In great physical and mental agony.
You were not there when all hell broke loose.
You did not protect me from the abuse.
Instead you stood idly by
While sexual and physical abuse made me cry.
No comfort from you,
No protection from harm,
Just lots of bruises on my little arms.
You did not care even though you could see
Exactly what was happening to me.
I don't care for your cape, I'm not impressed,
For you saw me, too, like they did, undressed.
So go away from me, I'm not your child.
If you really cared you'd have driven me away for miles.
But that you did not do, no you ignored my requests
And instead gave me a life of strife and unrest.
I have no need for you so now I will go.
I don't care about Jesus and His glorious throne.
You turned your back on me you didn't do what you should.
Instead you did exactly what I thought you would.
Abandon my innocence, steal the trust,
Make the abusers smile with each thrust.
Tolerate their sin and then set them free.
But what about my hurts???
What about me???
I long to be cleansed, I long to be set free.
Right now it's not mine to have,
For the pictures in my head are very very bad.
I can get past it, alone I always do,
So go help someone else,
I don't need you.
