Dear Abba,
I am grieved. I suspect (with no proof) that my mental illness has caused another casualty. I don't know this for sure. I've asked for another explanation but haven't received one. Yet.
The shaking is back. My head and hands are trembling. It's distracting. Faith often asks what I'm feeling. I think I'm sad and a little bit afraid. Sad losing a friend (which I've felt since October) and afraid of the truth she might tell me.
I know what I have is difficult for some people. It's difficult for me, too. I'm trying my best to not mess up. Sometimes I think being perfect would be so much easier for others. But not for me.
I don't feel well. This bronchitis and hacking cough are tiring. I want to lay down but sometimes that causes a coughing spasm. Those hurt. I might be a little depressed, too.
This week is filled with fun stuff with Tina's kids. I'm busy traveling back and forth to Woodstock. I'm enjoying my time with them as we celebrate a birthday, make cookies, talk about the dog show, listen to a choral concert, go to a track meet, visit the classroom and watch a school play. Everyone's growing up so fast. I cherish these times.
Please help me be the woman you are creating me to be.
Love your daughter,
Amy Kathleen
