I'm simply void.
Void yet 50% functional. I worked on a chart that is critical for an event where I'm volunteering. Answered some emails for the same event. Washed my hair and put on a clean sweatshirt. Put $5 of gas in my car. Went to a business to hang up two signs for the event. Drove down Main Street to eyeball where Cub Scouts and their parents could stand and cheer for the runners on the day of the event.
Then I found myself pulling into the library. The institution I'm volunteering to help raise funds for. I pulled in and decided I'll look for a couple of movies but not a book because I haven't been able to read for many months. After looking in the DVDs, I walked to the computers and began looking up books. I love John Grisham. I went back to his early days and found a book I hadn't read.
Just then one of the gals who is also on our committee greeted me. I smiled and acknowledged her greeting. I hoped I didn't look mentally ill. That is a concern believe it or not. But since I'd washed my hair and put on a clean shirt, chances of that happening were very low.
I found a book and two DVDs. It felt good to be there. I was having a sharp pain in my chest and chalked it up to anxiety or stress or something else. I knew God was helping me get through being out of my house and around other people. Quite frankly the library has always been a safe place to unwind. Aside from a few screaming kids because of the new renovation, my library is often a source of relaxation.
Now I'm home. I'm not washing any dishes. I'm not vacuuming. My chest still hurts but I know I am feeling stressed. I'm going to take the medication that helps calm me down. It's okay to take it because that's what it's for.
I hope you are having a nice weekend. We have a lot of sun though it's chilly. May God bless you with peace beyond all understanding especially during the storms of this life.
