I'm very tired. So much so that I keep dozing off as I struggle to put together my thoughts. I hope this makes some sort of sense when it's finished.
I was watching the drama series 24. Jack Bauer has a very complicated life between the counter terrorism unit and his family. He struggles to please everyone.
Since the show is based on one twenty-four hour period at a time, we only get to see one hour of the day each week. It's amazing to me how many events take place that effect a single or small group of people. Compared to our lives today, it's quite accurate.
What I choose to do, who I choose to interact with, where I choose to go and the route I choose to get there involve many more people than just me. I remember the early days of recovery when I thought everyone and everything revolved around me. No way! I believe we revolve around each other.
There are some days, like today, when I don't leave the house. Even then I'm effecting people. I'm either answering or not answering the phone or email or twitter or checking facebook. I'm either plugged in or not plugged in. If I go outside to put away the garbage can I can say hi to someone or not. Today, I yelled at the person leaving a message on my answering machine while I pressed my hands to my ears. I'm sure I looked odd but I felt violated. And it was a real person - not a computer I could hang up on.
One hour at a time each week. Wouldn't it be nice to manage that little sliver each week?
I think it would be.
