I have two close friends grieving their mothers death. One from three years ago; the other two months ago. My grief from the loss of a friend who helped me through a lot of my issues died eight years ago tomorrow. How long someone is gone, what they meant to us, our beliefs and understanding of where they are now - all of them are different. But each of us hurts.
In small group we've been doing a study about "Discerning the Voice of God." The study talked about strongholds - those areas in our lives that keep us from giving to God what is His to handle - not ours. My strongholds are eating, self-injury and isolating. No surprise to me except that God wants to replace those strongholds with His benefits.
Since I haven't self-injured, I received a vision at church and floated it's validity with trusting and discerning friends. All confirmed that it was of God and it's time for me to start writing. So I did. Yesterday. The first sentence, "You are the light of the world."
Think about that for a moment. I consider myself broken and in need of His constant healing. Throughout my life darkness meant danger. In my recovery darkness meant healing. And now, darkness is simply the setting of the sun so I turn on my lights.
"You are the light of the world." Jesus is talking to me, to His followers. Jesus said to pick up his cross and follow him. God created light out of the darkness when He was creating the world and all that is in it, He created me in my mother's womb. He sheltered me from the light for nine months then brought me out of the dark warmth into the lit cold. He did all of it and yet He said:
“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden."
Everyone who has accepted Jesus' gift of eternal life in exchange for payment of their sins are now torches of light. I trudge up mountains at night, I camp at night, I travel roads at night, I navigate unfamiliar places at night. I sit outside at night. I sleep at night, my cells regenerate at night and I am usually at peace at night. Jesus makes all of it possible for He is the eternal flame of our light.
He calmed a storm at night, he retreated to the mountainside at night, he hung from the cross while a violent storm caused the earth to shake and darkness covered the earth for three days and he even met with a leader at night. He is the light before and after the darkness.
John 8:12 [Full Chapter]
When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”
Light.
Life.
All of it because of His existence.
Genesis 1New International Version (NIV)
The Beginning
1 In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. 2 Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.
3 And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. 4 God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness. 5 God calledthe light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day.
And when we feel the darkness creeping into our lives, whether it be grief or depression or bipolar or panic or anxiety or any other description we want to give it, remember that Jesus is with us in the darkness. All of darkness is not bad or weak or somehow our fault. Darkness happens. It's knowing when we need help that we reach out and ask for it. There are times I need to sit in the darkness in order to see God's healing light. The light makes itself known.
Darkness has a purpose and it's not all bad.
If we seek God and patiently wait for Him to reveal the light,
The light will shine.
In the meantime, be at peace.
"Godspell" - Original Cast, "Light of the World."
