When I was in high school, running away from my problems was the best decision. I couldn't handle confronting the sexual abuse and physical abuse. Even though my Dad had already moved out the residue of the abuse was still with me. Talking with my school counselor and my school social worker was too scary. Instead, I talked about what I could and hid the rest.
In twelve step groups, I would tell my story at open AA meetings. I told about some of the abuse but did not disclose too much. It was too painful.
It wasn't until I became a Christian and entered into Christian counseling that I learned the value of confronting your problems instead of running from them. I had a friend who helped me understand how Jesus was with me during the abuse and was crying when it happened. I couldn't imagine such love for me.
As my mental and physical worlds began to unravel, I made a commitment to stop running and start walking through my problems. God has sent three wonderful therapists and we're not through yet. I'm still walking and the problems aren't as debilitating.
With the support of friends, a therapist, medication, my family and a loving God, I no longer have to be afraid of my problems. If they are scary, I can write or talk about them. The feelings I have do not have to control how good or bad I feel.
And if I do choose to run?
I can always turn around and come back home.
