So I looked it up. The preacher's perspective was contrary to what Prov 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take."
To me, this verse says to trust God with every portion of my heart.
To trust God's wisdom, not my own.
To seek his will all the time, not my own.
When I do this, he will show me the path he wants me to follow which may not be the path I want to follow.
It's complete submission to what He wants for me - not what I want for me.
God cannot be manipulated by anything I do or say. Unlike human beings, God's character remains the same and does not waiver under any circumstance. He cannot be bribed and he cannot be tricked.
When I am living in His trust, his understanding, his will and on his path, I can be certain it's all him and only him. I'm better able to discern the steps he wants me to take because I am IN him and he is IN me.
I am in a constant state of change and growth because of my relationship with Jesus in whose image I am being transformed into (Paraphrase of 2 Cor 3:18 NIV). Simply put - I am God's daughter and in his presence I can rest. I can put my hand in his hand and let him guide me to those places I need to grow and change.
I'll never be alone again. Even when I feel alone in the isolating world of mental illness there will be moments of peace. And in those moments of peace there will be moments of reminders that God my Father, Jesus Christ my Savior and the Holy Spirit my Counselor will be with me.
The three of them, also known as the Trinity, will always have my back.
