About This Blog

My blog shares my recovery journey from childhood abuse to living with mental illness. I've been involved in twelve step groups and therapy since 1982. I accepted Jesus as my Savior in 1988. To the best of my ability, I have followed where He wants me to go and what He wants me to do. Maybe you'll find the hope and strength you need through what I write. Maybe you want to stop hurting yourself. Maybe you have a friend who needs help and can benefit from my story. I was newly disabled when I asked God this question: "What do you want me to do with my life?" I closed my eyes and paused for a few moments to still my mind. This is what I sensed from Him: "Amy, I want you to write your story to bring hope and healing to those who are still suffering." And that's exactly what I am doing!

Friday, August 22, 2014

The Introvert Cave

You'd think being home 24/7 on disability would meet the requirements of leading an introverted life.  I'm finding it can become just as hectic due to a diminished capacity or tolerance for stressful living.  Some of which I have control over - most of it I do not.

"The Introvert Cave," as I call it, is a safe place to retreat from the noise of this world.  I am removed from most civilization activities because I stay inside.

Allow me to describe my cave.  It's a journey to get there.  There are no roads or paths.  I carry a backpack that holds all I need.  Like what?

  • Bible
  • Journal and pen
  • Flashlight
  • White chaulk
  • Light blanket and pillow
  • Waterproof matches
  • Change of clothes
  • Roll of toilet paper
The cave is hidden in the mountains where only the animals roam.  It's surrounded by a forest and a stream that runs about a half-mile to the east.  The water is cold and clear, safe for drinking.  The forest has many trees that have fallen which supplies ample firewood.  Wild blueberries and other flavorful delights are within walking distance.  I want for nothing.

The cave itself has an opening that is neither too big or too small.  It provides the right amount of light.  The temperature is cool without dampness.  It has markings on the stone walls from previous visits. There's a rock shaped fire pit from the small boulders I carried back from the stream.   I can tell from the thin layer of dirt on the floor where I last laid my head.  I feel instant peace and calm.

There is no routine for the day.  I quiet my mind and let the Lord into this place.  He is always with me but I'm not always aware of His presence because of the yammering in my head.

He waits for me.
He shows Himself to me.
He longs to share what He wants me to do.

And at the end of this journey in my cave, is all the peace and love I need so that I can carry on in His footsteps.

If you'd like to read the whole true story about another cave dweller named Elijah,  Click Here