It doesn't seem that long ago but I guess a lot of people in my family feel the same way. There's hearing on the other end of your phone, "Amy, you have to get to NIMC right away."
NIMC is the hospital we all knew as Northern Illinois Medical Center in McHenry. They'd changed over to Centegra years ago but if you were a true resident of McHenry or neighboring towns it was always going to be NIMC. Just like Macy's on State Street in Chicago would always be remembered as Marshall Field's, Willis Tower will always be called Sears Tower, Allstate Arena would be called Rosemont Horizon and US Cellular Field would be Comiskey Park.
No matter what the name of the hospital was something serious was wrong with Aaron. I could hear it in my mom's voice. Aaron comes from a large family. As you may already know I'm not a fan of large groups of people. I remember parking my car close to the ER entrance. I sat and prayed, asking God to prepare me for whatever was going to happen. I also asked Him to let me be a source of comfort for my family and anyone else who needed it. I took a deep breath, got out of my car and headed for that large door where the unknown awaited.I immediately felt a lot of tension. Not because people were not getting along but because the dire circumstances of Aaron's condition were weighing so heavily on everyone. I had yet to find out what happened. Here's what I was told:
Aaron was cruising around with a couple of buddies who were riding in the front seat. They were on their way to an ALATEEN MEETING. While Aaron was in the back seat, he decided to huff propane from a camping size container that looks like this:
TO LEARN ABOUT INHALANT ABUSE CLICK HERE
We learned later from Aaron's friends that this was not his first time. In fact, he had been huffing for a long time. None of his friends ever told his family because they did not see the danger in it. They, too, huffed inhalants and nothing ever happened to them.
While in the back of the car all of a sudden Aaron began to have convulsions and seizures. The driver pulled off the road immediately to call a buddy then he called 911. Aaron's body stopped moving and he stopped breathing. The boys administered CPR until the paramedics arrived. By this time, Aaron's heart had stopped beating and his brain had been without oxygen for 10 minutes. With their machines, Aaron's heart began to beat again and they rushed him to NIMC.
As a Christian, the Bible says God knows everything about me: PSALM 139
I don't have to worry about anything. And yet I wonder about those 10 minutes when Aaron died. When we die, in my Christian belief, our spirit goes one of two ways: Heaven or Hell.
But if the body comes back to "life", then what?
I was asked if I wanted to have some time alone with Aaron. I said, "Yes." I walked back to where he was laying. He was so still. Eight days prior we celebrated Easter together. All of us shared with Aaron what Jesus meant to us. Nothing preachy - straight from our hearts. Even little Alicia told her story about Jesus living in her heart. I saw Aaron listening and asking questions. You could tell he was pondering what we were sharing with him.
And now, here he was. My precious 18 year old nephew in a physical state I could not wrap my mind around. For some reason, God has given me this weird ability to discern with my hands how to pray for someone. I might get woken up at night or be prompted when I see them. This time, I was prompted to put my right hand on his forehead and my left hand over his heart. I closed my eyes and stayed like that for a little while. Do you know what I felt?
Nothing. Aaron was gone. There was no brain activity and there was nothing inside of him that was him. He wasn't there even though his body was there. I kissed him on the forehead, told him I loved him then went out into the waiting room. I talked to my sisters who wanted to know what I thought. It hurt me to say it but I told my sister who is Aaron's Stepmom that I didn't feel anything - that I think he's gone. She said she thought so, too.
Before Aaron was moved to a private room in ICCU, everyone gathered around Aaron to say a prayer. When they asked if anyone would like to pray, I raised my hand. I prayed for his comfort and for the family going through this hard time. I prayed for Aaron to get better but if he didn't that we would all.....and I was cut off by a lady who was intoxicated. It's hard to prepare people when others are in such a state of denial that it does more damage than good.
I stayed in the waiting room with my family including my sister's daughters who were exhausted. We snuggled up and said prayers for Aaron. When Aaron was in his room and my sister and brother-in-law returned, it was time to go home. My nephews had already left.
And so began a five day journey none of us wanted to travel.
